Skip to main content
Founding FuelFounding Fuel

Ask these questions to make your coaching and leadership effective

Coaching is an essential leadership skill. And questions are a good way to open doors, says Michael Bungay Stanier in his book ‘The Coaching Habit’

16 March 2017· 1 min read

The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More and Change the Way You Lead Forever

By Michael Bungay Stanier

Slide

Everyone now knows that managers and leaders need to coach their people.

Daniel Goleman put a stake in the ground more than 15 years ago by saying that coaching was one of six essential leadership styles to get superior results.

You are possibly getting very good coaching, and you are not delivering effective coaching.

7 questions for coaching

  • The kickstart question
  • The focus question
  • The foundation question
  • The lazy question
  • The strategic question
  • The learning question

One of the reasons managers don’t coach is because they don’t know where to start.

Answers are closed rooms and questions are open doors that invite us in.

If you know what question to ask, get to the point and ask it.

The awe question is, “And what else?”

When you ask what else, you are being curious, attentive, and genuine.

Ask the right questions if you want the right answers.

Focus on the real problem, not the first problem.

Without a good question, a good answer has no place to go.

If you are not trying to fix things, you don’t need a backstory or the background.

The foundation question is, “What do you want?”

Five times a second, your brain is scanning the environment and asking, is it safe here or is it dangerous?

The Karpman Drama Triangle has three elements: the victim, the persecutor and the rescuer.

The minute we think we have all the answers, we forget the questions.

“How can I help?” and “What do you want from me?” are powerful questions at work and in relationships.

One of the best things you can do after asking a question is to listen to the answer.

A “yes” is nothing without the “no” that gives it boundaries and form.

Questions are not about judging people. They should be about encouraging them to think.

Your job is to create space for those learning moments.

We live in a world that our questions create.

The Coaching Habit: Say Less, Ask More and Change the Way You Lead Forever

By Michael Bungay Stanier

Buy it on Amazon

Founding Fuel is sustained by readers who value depth, context, and independent thinking.

If this essay helped you think more clearly, you may choose to support our work.

Illustration of supportersIllustration of supporters

Beyond the noise is the signal.

FF Insights: Sharpen your edge, Monday–Friday.
FF Life: Culture, ideas and perspectives you won't find elsewhere — Saturday.

Readers also liked

When AI Writes the Code, Who Guards the System?
·Artificial Intelligence

When AI Writes the Code, Who Guards the System?

As AI-assisted coding accelerates software development, enterprises face a new challenge: ensuring governance, accountability, and safety keep pace with machine-speed innovation

CG
Chirantan Ghosh

Chirantan Ghosh

Seasoned technologist | Growth architect and business leader

Built to Move, Designed to Stop
·Economy, Policy & Society

Built to Move, Designed to Stop

Why India’s systems keep interrupting its own momentum

AC
Ajay Chacko

Ajay Chacko

Director | Keya Foods International