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Character is about who we choose to be

Insights from General Stanley McChrystal’s new book ‘On Character: Choices That Define a Life’. The book is in Shivakumar’s list of best books of summer 2025

21 June 2025· 1 min read

 

On Character: Choices That Define a Life

By General Stanley McChrystal

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Character is not inherited at birth or a gift from a learned mentor.
Character is a choice.

Character = Convictions x Discipline.

Socrates said the unexamined life is not worth living.

When belief is broken, it is difficult to rebuild, particularly if it rests on blind faith.

Whom we fear is largely a question of perspective.
We fear people and ideas we don’t know.

Usually, we don’t know who the enemy is—we are told.

On a personal level, perspective demands thoughtfulness.

The key is to navigate from where you are, not where you wish you were.

For me, the army was more than a job, it was a life choice.

I never viewed my job as something separate from the rest of my life.

Work, family and leisure is a highly personal equation.
The key is finding what’s right for you and understanding the cost.

As I discovered in Iraq and Afghanistan, war elicits towering courage and commitment that is humbling to behold.

In the military, I learned to speak to soldiers differently on a sunny day and a rainy day.
Communication is always about context.

Anger and disappointment are difficult to convey virtually on a video call.

Work is an exchange of two most important commodities—time and energy.

We’re often forced to take a side even when we’d rather not.

We grow when we learn.
We learn when we read.

The essence of character lies in maintaining our most important convictions when its most tempting not to.

Personalities vary, but self-discipline can be learned and is largely a choice.

For some time following my fall, I felt adrift.

The teams that work the hardest and get the most done have an infectious positivity amongst the ranks.

There is always a temptation to make everything important.
In the 1970s, the US army put out a manual for training which meant training was more than number of days available in a year.

Setting and adhering to standards is a leader’s personal responsibility.

Quitting sometimes can be a wise move.

To lead well demands tireless, often exhausting focus.

Leaders must do what their people need, not what they want.

The power of a small written note from a leader is well remembered.

For most it is less about working from home and more about our role in the organization.

The West Point cadet prayer: “Make us choose the harder truth instead of the easier wrong and never be content with a half truth when the whole can be won.”

Our tolerance for poor behavior defines our values.

The most important time to do what’s right is when it is difficult.

On Character: Choices That Define a Life

By General Stanley McChrystal

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